Roommate Who Labels All Her Food Asks You to Not Be So Passive Aggressive

Danielle De Lano
Danielle De Lano
November 24, 2020

Heavily sighing as she texted you from the living room, your roommate Chelseigh bemoaned what she described as your “passive-aggressive behavior,” which was leaving the opened electric bill on the kitchen counter. At press time, it was confirmed that Chelseigh had never brought an article of food into the home that she had not then written her name on in Sharpie.

“I’m just saying, if you needed me to Venmo you sooner, you could have just sent the request or asked me. I just wish you’d be more direct,” she typed, reminding you of when she had scrawled “I’M LATE” into the dust on your car windshield, after you had parked behind her in the driveway.

When you tried to defend yourself, stating it was not meant to be any attack, that you simply left the bill on the counter, Chelseigh protested saying, “[Y]ou do this all the time! Like when you texted me last night to ask if I wanted any of the Chicken Cordon Bleu you had made for dinner, instead of knocking on my door and offering in person.” The last time you knocked on Chelseigh’s door to ask a quick question, she requested you text her beforehand to set a “roomie meeting.”

The same woman who began removing toilet paper rolls from the bathroom, insisting that she did not buy toilet paper for the whole apartment, continued to suggest that your behavior was incredibly immature and unwarranted.

When Chelseigh was asked about her own passive-aggressive behavior, she was found labelling individual tampons from a box she just purchased. She declined to comment, insisting she wasn’t mad, only later to send a text saying she wished you were more direct and handled things like an adult.